South Africa - The Suicide Club
25 min - 19 January 2004
Father: I know God I would like to tell how people our story of heartbreak
I would like to tell you that I am a broken man. Before my daughter died I was young. I was not xxx I was 50 years old, I didnt have a grey hair. Look at me today. My childs death broke my heart.
On Friday 4th July I came home at a quarter to one. My daughter was in the study to ask her firstly
I went into the study and asked; Felicity, are you ill?. She said; No Daddy, Im just dying.
I went to the butcher. The butcher was full of people; I met a friend there. But Eta was coming down xxx street. I saw the people there, so I shouted; Whats going on? So, my sister answered; Its Fely!.
What about Fely?
In the house!
So I ran. I saw my wife with Felicity. This was on the ground; in the grass. Stella was applying CPR and mouth-to-mouth. I asked her; Stella, whats wrong?
She hanged herself.
And I saw the rope. The rope that my daughter used was the rope that I gave to her because she asked me for that as a skipping rope. I cut it from a sheaf and I know it because I burned the ends. But I didnt teach my daughter to tie knots, but one thing I can tell you, she tied a perfect knot.
Girls sitting around grave singing
Girl: If theres one thing Ill never forget it was her laugh and definitely her sense of humour. I think that is something that we miss the most about Felicity.
Girl 1: She was a person that was always out-going, and honest and was a person that you could talk to and if you had a problem she would always be there by your side.
Shots of grave and flowers
Girl 2: Incoherent no matter what just want to say never forget you
Girl 3: She always told us what kind of music we must play at her funeral and what she wanted us to wear, the colours and things like that. She wanted blue tops and black, blue and black we were to wear for her funeral, she always wanted that.
Girl 4: She didnt even leave a letter or note or something to say what the problem was. Just left us with the question. I dont understand
Girl 5: Her parents are heartbroken. They seriously theres no word to explain how they feel now. Its too much for him to deal with. Teenagers think its in fashion to commit suicide. So many teenagers have tried to commit suicide now and I think that theres no reason in this world that can lead you to commit suicide. Theres no problem so big that the only way out is death.
Voice-over: Kimberley, Capital of the Northern Cape, aprovince known for its mining riches. With a population of just over 200,000, Kimberley is also marked by high unemployment and a lack of opportunity. With little or no recreation facilities, many young people are caught in the cycle of violence, drug abuse and depression. Many say they have no one to turn to for help. During the last three months, the Kimberley hospital saw almost 150 suicide attempts, 49 of these successful. At least ten teenagers a week tried to take their own lives.
In response to the crisis, the hospital has introduced a 24-hour counselling service. Elaine van der Berg is a chief social worker.
Elaine van der Berg: How are you doing? I just want to find out, you say you are better now
Patient: I ended up in hospital
Elaine van der Berg: I think mostly most of the crisis is financial issues. Theres not a lot of work options in Kimberley. Also recreation facilities and then mostly relationship problems.
Patient: then I have decided that, ok, nobody wants me
Elaine van der Berg: Most suicides are a cry for help because they will drink tablets and then tell someone that I drank the tablets because I want someone to know because I dont really want to die. Then youll get guys as well three or four times that they tried to commit suicide and its really like saying; Just ask me whats wrong. Dont just tell me everything will be ok.
Voice-over: Suicide is on the increase in SA. At the Kimberley morgue 17% of the bodies are the result of suicide, more than twice the national average
Elaine van der Berg: Its becoming a copy-cat issue, where everyone is trying it.
Teacher: This afternoon well be doing the poem by Wilfred Owen Anthem for Doomed Youth. What passing bells for these who die as cattle ?
Voice-over: The Northern Cape has had the highest Matric pass rate for two years running.
Head Teacher: Sorry to interrupt you, good morning. Good afternoon, dont you greet me? Dont you greet me? Were not going to continue for a while because I need to speak to you. Is that fine? May I speak to your class please?
Voice-over: This school has been affected by suicide. The NEC for education says its time to intervene.
Head Teacher: May I speak to your class please? I havent told you to sit down. I havent told you to sit down. Is this your school uniform? Im looking for your school uniform and all I see is a motley collection of colours. You may sit down.
Were not simply educating you for a Matric certificate. Were educating you to be the future generation of South Africa. But if life becomes cheap and our young people think that they can solve their problems through taking their own lives then we have a serious problem. You cannot close ranks or sweep it under the carpet. You have to take this seriously. We have a lost generation. Have you heard about the lost generation? The youth of the 70s and the 80s were called the Lost Generation. You are the Freedom Generation. You know youre the Freedom Generation?
To Camera: We have a group of people who are doing very well, but certainly the cracks are showing. And if weve been in government for ten years and we have an increase in teenage suicide, then there is something amiss. I think we have failed our young people somewhere along the line. Im concerned about this.
Voice-over: 195 pupils have attempted suicide in the past 6 months. In response, education department has launched a campaign. Here, teachers are portrayed to deal with suicide
Teacher: This is often accompanied by substance abuse, risk-taking behaviour. It may seem that they dont care and its a major cause of suicide. And we found it in many places that its really a strong learn, its a positive learn. It was a learn that was a xxx peer-group and now shes gone and the friends gone too. So we must also think about others in the community and around us. We also say for each suicide there is up to 100 and (among teenagers) up to 200 people that will attempt suicide. So if we hear of one or two suicides, we must think; How many attempts are there?
Interviewer: Do you know that we have a problem with suicide in our province? And Im sure you know of a child or two that have attempted suicide? Well, I think there has been an increase in the amount of attempted suicide, actually, a major increase in the amount of attempted suicide, and as the education department we detected this about three or four months ago and were really just trying to deal with the issue and we need to get to the parents.
(handing out leaflets) I want you to share that with your teacher at school. Give it to your class teacher.
Interviewer: So shes tried it twice? Why is it that your child attempted it twice, what is the reason?
Woman: Because shes naughty
Interviewer: Because shes naughty? You think thats it Maam? Maybe just talk with her, just listen a bit.
Woman: I talk to her and Im open with her
.
Youve got to be careful, sometimes we think were open, but were still the mother so we do all the talking and the child just listens, so shes tried it twice, the third time she may not try it and it may really work. Im hoping that this pamphlet will help. Spend some time tonight just talking.
Voice-over: Leigh-Anne Appro is 16 years old. Recently she took an overdose of pills after an argument with her mother.
Leigh-Ann: I was sitting at home, looking television and saw my mother came from work and then she told me that the Principal did call and said I was not at school for two days and she asked me why and I said no the place was closed. And so I tell her no, I want to go to my father because my father will understand my reason. And so she tells me that I am two-faced and I like my fathers girl. So I came in the kitchen. My brother was in the kitchen because I want to take the knife and cut my balls.
Interview with brother untranslated
I was lying in the hospital for two weeks. When I came back I regretted, I said to myself; Everybody makes mistakes in their life. All the people was loving me, taking care of me. Now its something in my mind, I want to kill myself because I dont want to live any more. And the doctor said its a miracle that Im still alive because it can affect my heart, my kidney and all the things. And my little brother did cry when he see me in hospital. He said; Anna, Anna come back, and I did and I said to myself; I will break a lot of peoples hearts.
Interview with brother untranslated
Voice-over: Some of Leigh-Anns friends have also attempted suicide.
Woman: I dont feel its a place for a young person to grow up in because they have a lot of problems down there. I mean the crime rate is very high, drugs and all that type of thing.
Woman 1: The only thing that young people like doing is going to the club, trawling with their friends and all those things, but you just know the things that the young people can do
Woman: The youngsters, they usually go to club
Woman 1: Thats all they do, go to clubs, intoxicate and do the boning
Woman 2: I think teenagers are making suicide a habit because theyll just have an argument with their parents then try to kill themselves
Boy, untranslated
Woman 1: Well, so I tried to xxx
Boy, untranslated
Woman 1: Dont think about what youre doing, just go for it.
Boy, untranslated
Girl: This last month has not been my month. I have considered suicide very much, actually. But then I realised that its being selfish because Ive got so many friends around me now that I look after.
Girl 1: Most of us are on depression tablets and it makes us very sleepy and were not normal any more because when you think of this also committing suicide, or something like that, and then you must have the tablets to cope with it.
Girl 2: It was like the pain was not just emotional but in the physical vein also because the side of the depression tablets are always headaches and things like that so the emotional and the physical pain was just getting too much. So I just decided Im trying to end everything.
Girl: She didnt think of anybody at that time. Just like Felicity didnt think of anybody when she committed suicide. Unfortunately Felicitys method of suicide there was just no saving her.
Head Teacher: In a small community you have a xxx people know each other, people are closely linked. In some instances weve had copycat suicides. If you havent dealt with one incident successfully it will impact on the broader community or the broader school community. If you speak to the elders or people older they will say to you that suicide was never a black phenomenon. Black people never really saw suicide as solutions to their problems so how do black people address this problem that has never been a part of our culture and heritage?
Man: My name is xxx and I used to be called xxx because of my smiling faces. It was on Monday, I will never forget it; I go to the petrol station, I buy a grapefruit, I go home. At home I skinned it. I was in a problem; I cant solve it and I didnt get solutions how to solve the problem. So I committed suicide because I wanted to be dead. Three people try to commit suicide but unfortunately of those three people two died and one survived and that one who survived this one was last year. My best friend was in school with me. So the second person she was my friend. She tried to commit suicide and she survived. So the third one, she was also my girlfriend, then she takes pills and after it she died.
Voice-over: After his attempt, a hospital social worker induced xxx to join the group.
And she told me that; What are you doing with your spare time? In my spare time always I am going home, I dont do nothing. Then she said; I would be so pleased if you did something. xxx
Im with them all the time when I come from work, Im so happy to be with those people because I appreciate a lot of things.
Girl: I have big dreams me and xxx were supposed to go to PopStars to go enter and sing but I feel were still going to do it were not going to give up were going to do it for her.
Christelle xxx, the school social worker, has studied this problem for Felicitys friends to help them deal with the loss.
Christelle: Are you suffering? Its ok at this stage to feel angry, its very normal to be angry at somebody who has committed suicide, at somebody who left you alone.
Girl: Its like, I can just curl up in my bed and stay there forever. If I had happy for her to come back maybe if was a better friend, was a then maybe she would stop here today
Father: If you think about committing suicide, go to your parents firstly, your friends secondly, tell them, tell them how youre feeling.
Girl: And if you have a problem, speak to someone you trust, even if its not your parents.
Woman 2: Its not worth doing that, your own life because there are so many people youre going to hurt.
Man: Death is not the solution you can ever choose in life
Leigh-Ann: So face your problems. Face it. Everything will be ok. Some day it will be ok.
SABC
(Ref: 2029)
25 min - 19 January 2004
Father: I know God I would like to tell how people our story of heartbreak
I would like to tell you that I am a broken man. Before my daughter died I was young. I was not xxx I was 50 years old, I didnt have a grey hair. Look at me today. My childs death broke my heart.
On Friday 4th July I came home at a quarter to one. My daughter was in the study to ask her firstly
I went into the study and asked; Felicity, are you ill?. She said; No Daddy, Im just dying.
I went to the butcher. The butcher was full of people; I met a friend there. But Eta was coming down xxx street. I saw the people there, so I shouted; Whats going on? So, my sister answered; Its Fely!.
What about Fely?
In the house!
So I ran. I saw my wife with Felicity. This was on the ground; in the grass. Stella was applying CPR and mouth-to-mouth. I asked her; Stella, whats wrong?
She hanged herself.
And I saw the rope. The rope that my daughter used was the rope that I gave to her because she asked me for that as a skipping rope. I cut it from a sheaf and I know it because I burned the ends. But I didnt teach my daughter to tie knots, but one thing I can tell you, she tied a perfect knot.
Girls sitting around grave singing
Girl: If theres one thing Ill never forget it was her laugh and definitely her sense of humour. I think that is something that we miss the most about Felicity.
Girl 1: She was a person that was always out-going, and honest and was a person that you could talk to and if you had a problem she would always be there by your side.
Shots of grave and flowers
Girl 2: Incoherent no matter what just want to say never forget you
Girl 3: She always told us what kind of music we must play at her funeral and what she wanted us to wear, the colours and things like that. She wanted blue tops and black, blue and black we were to wear for her funeral, she always wanted that.
Girl 4: She didnt even leave a letter or note or something to say what the problem was. Just left us with the question. I dont understand
Girl 5: Her parents are heartbroken. They seriously theres no word to explain how they feel now. Its too much for him to deal with. Teenagers think its in fashion to commit suicide. So many teenagers have tried to commit suicide now and I think that theres no reason in this world that can lead you to commit suicide. Theres no problem so big that the only way out is death.
Voice-over: Kimberley, Capital of the Northern Cape, aprovince known for its mining riches. With a population of just over 200,000, Kimberley is also marked by high unemployment and a lack of opportunity. With little or no recreation facilities, many young people are caught in the cycle of violence, drug abuse and depression. Many say they have no one to turn to for help. During the last three months, the Kimberley hospital saw almost 150 suicide attempts, 49 of these successful. At least ten teenagers a week tried to take their own lives.
In response to the crisis, the hospital has introduced a 24-hour counselling service. Elaine van der Berg is a chief social worker.
Elaine van der Berg: How are you doing? I just want to find out, you say you are better now
Patient: I ended up in hospital
Elaine van der Berg: I think mostly most of the crisis is financial issues. Theres not a lot of work options in Kimberley. Also recreation facilities and then mostly relationship problems.
Patient: then I have decided that, ok, nobody wants me
Elaine van der Berg: Most suicides are a cry for help because they will drink tablets and then tell someone that I drank the tablets because I want someone to know because I dont really want to die. Then youll get guys as well three or four times that they tried to commit suicide and its really like saying; Just ask me whats wrong. Dont just tell me everything will be ok.
Voice-over: Suicide is on the increase in SA. At the Kimberley morgue 17% of the bodies are the result of suicide, more than twice the national average
Elaine van der Berg: Its becoming a copy-cat issue, where everyone is trying it.
Teacher: This afternoon well be doing the poem by Wilfred Owen Anthem for Doomed Youth. What passing bells for these who die as cattle ?
Voice-over: The Northern Cape has had the highest Matric pass rate for two years running.
Head Teacher: Sorry to interrupt you, good morning. Good afternoon, dont you greet me? Dont you greet me? Were not going to continue for a while because I need to speak to you. Is that fine? May I speak to your class please?
Voice-over: This school has been affected by suicide. The NEC for education says its time to intervene.
Head Teacher: May I speak to your class please? I havent told you to sit down. I havent told you to sit down. Is this your school uniform? Im looking for your school uniform and all I see is a motley collection of colours. You may sit down.
Were not simply educating you for a Matric certificate. Were educating you to be the future generation of South Africa. But if life becomes cheap and our young people think that they can solve their problems through taking their own lives then we have a serious problem. You cannot close ranks or sweep it under the carpet. You have to take this seriously. We have a lost generation. Have you heard about the lost generation? The youth of the 70s and the 80s were called the Lost Generation. You are the Freedom Generation. You know youre the Freedom Generation?
To Camera: We have a group of people who are doing very well, but certainly the cracks are showing. And if weve been in government for ten years and we have an increase in teenage suicide, then there is something amiss. I think we have failed our young people somewhere along the line. Im concerned about this.
Voice-over: 195 pupils have attempted suicide in the past 6 months. In response, education department has launched a campaign. Here, teachers are portrayed to deal with suicide
Teacher: This is often accompanied by substance abuse, risk-taking behaviour. It may seem that they dont care and its a major cause of suicide. And we found it in many places that its really a strong learn, its a positive learn. It was a learn that was a xxx peer-group and now shes gone and the friends gone too. So we must also think about others in the community and around us. We also say for each suicide there is up to 100 and (among teenagers) up to 200 people that will attempt suicide. So if we hear of one or two suicides, we must think; How many attempts are there?
Interviewer: Do you know that we have a problem with suicide in our province? And Im sure you know of a child or two that have attempted suicide? Well, I think there has been an increase in the amount of attempted suicide, actually, a major increase in the amount of attempted suicide, and as the education department we detected this about three or four months ago and were really just trying to deal with the issue and we need to get to the parents.
(handing out leaflets) I want you to share that with your teacher at school. Give it to your class teacher.
Interviewer: So shes tried it twice? Why is it that your child attempted it twice, what is the reason?
Woman: Because shes naughty
Interviewer: Because shes naughty? You think thats it Maam? Maybe just talk with her, just listen a bit.
Woman: I talk to her and Im open with her
.
Youve got to be careful, sometimes we think were open, but were still the mother so we do all the talking and the child just listens, so shes tried it twice, the third time she may not try it and it may really work. Im hoping that this pamphlet will help. Spend some time tonight just talking.
Voice-over: Leigh-Anne Appro is 16 years old. Recently she took an overdose of pills after an argument with her mother.
Leigh-Ann: I was sitting at home, looking television and saw my mother came from work and then she told me that the Principal did call and said I was not at school for two days and she asked me why and I said no the place was closed. And so I tell her no, I want to go to my father because my father will understand my reason. And so she tells me that I am two-faced and I like my fathers girl. So I came in the kitchen. My brother was in the kitchen because I want to take the knife and cut my balls.
Interview with brother untranslated
I was lying in the hospital for two weeks. When I came back I regretted, I said to myself; Everybody makes mistakes in their life. All the people was loving me, taking care of me. Now its something in my mind, I want to kill myself because I dont want to live any more. And the doctor said its a miracle that Im still alive because it can affect my heart, my kidney and all the things. And my little brother did cry when he see me in hospital. He said; Anna, Anna come back, and I did and I said to myself; I will break a lot of peoples hearts.
Interview with brother untranslated
Voice-over: Some of Leigh-Anns friends have also attempted suicide.
Woman: I dont feel its a place for a young person to grow up in because they have a lot of problems down there. I mean the crime rate is very high, drugs and all that type of thing.
Woman 1: The only thing that young people like doing is going to the club, trawling with their friends and all those things, but you just know the things that the young people can do
Woman: The youngsters, they usually go to club
Woman 1: Thats all they do, go to clubs, intoxicate and do the boning
Woman 2: I think teenagers are making suicide a habit because theyll just have an argument with their parents then try to kill themselves
Boy, untranslated
Woman 1: Well, so I tried to xxx
Boy, untranslated
Woman 1: Dont think about what youre doing, just go for it.
Boy, untranslated
Girl: This last month has not been my month. I have considered suicide very much, actually. But then I realised that its being selfish because Ive got so many friends around me now that I look after.
Girl 1: Most of us are on depression tablets and it makes us very sleepy and were not normal any more because when you think of this also committing suicide, or something like that, and then you must have the tablets to cope with it.
Girl 2: It was like the pain was not just emotional but in the physical vein also because the side of the depression tablets are always headaches and things like that so the emotional and the physical pain was just getting too much. So I just decided Im trying to end everything.
Girl: She didnt think of anybody at that time. Just like Felicity didnt think of anybody when she committed suicide. Unfortunately Felicitys method of suicide there was just no saving her.
Head Teacher: In a small community you have a xxx people know each other, people are closely linked. In some instances weve had copycat suicides. If you havent dealt with one incident successfully it will impact on the broader community or the broader school community. If you speak to the elders or people older they will say to you that suicide was never a black phenomenon. Black people never really saw suicide as solutions to their problems so how do black people address this problem that has never been a part of our culture and heritage?
Man: My name is xxx and I used to be called xxx because of my smiling faces. It was on Monday, I will never forget it; I go to the petrol station, I buy a grapefruit, I go home. At home I skinned it. I was in a problem; I cant solve it and I didnt get solutions how to solve the problem. So I committed suicide because I wanted to be dead. Three people try to commit suicide but unfortunately of those three people two died and one survived and that one who survived this one was last year. My best friend was in school with me. So the second person she was my friend. She tried to commit suicide and she survived. So the third one, she was also my girlfriend, then she takes pills and after it she died.
Voice-over: After his attempt, a hospital social worker induced xxx to join the group.
And she told me that; What are you doing with your spare time? In my spare time always I am going home, I dont do nothing. Then she said; I would be so pleased if you did something. xxx
Im with them all the time when I come from work, Im so happy to be with those people because I appreciate a lot of things.
Girl: I have big dreams me and xxx were supposed to go to PopStars to go enter and sing but I feel were still going to do it were not going to give up were going to do it for her.
Christelle xxx, the school social worker, has studied this problem for Felicitys friends to help them deal with the loss.
Christelle: Are you suffering? Its ok at this stage to feel angry, its very normal to be angry at somebody who has committed suicide, at somebody who left you alone.
Girl: Its like, I can just curl up in my bed and stay there forever. If I had happy for her to come back maybe if was a better friend, was a then maybe she would stop here today
Father: If you think about committing suicide, go to your parents firstly, your friends secondly, tell them, tell them how youre feeling.
Girl: And if you have a problem, speak to someone you trust, even if its not your parents.
Woman 2: Its not worth doing that, your own life because there are so many people youre going to hurt.
Man: Death is not the solution you can ever choose in life
Leigh-Ann: So face your problems. Face it. Everything will be ok. Some day it will be ok.
SABC
(Ref: 2029)