MOTHER INDIA

 

 

 

 

 

 

B&B film

Via della Stazione di S. Pietro, 40

00165 Rome, Italy

www.bbfilm.tv

 

 

10:01:03:09 - 10:01:47:22

JHUMA I feel sometimes very… lonely. Eight years over and I don't have any child. It's really a painful problem for me. Niladri's friends, his friend's wife, my friends… some of my friends, some of my relatives… when they meet me they ask me: why? Is there any problem, are you visiting a doctor? And all... These are the questions, and questions are very irritating, it really irritates me. They know everything, but still…

 

10:01:54:18 - 10:02:06:11

JHUMA Sometimes, nowadays, I always try to avoid marriage occasions, babies’birthdays, any occasion. The same questions, the same faces, the same…

 

10:02:20:10 - 10:02:55:08

JHUMA I don’t know properly, actually. I know that… They know all the situation all the problems of me, still they ask me. Why, I don't know. Perhaps they want to… you know, they want to insult me. Having no child a lady is inauspicious. They don't want to go close, they always try to avoid me.

 

10:03:42:03 - 10:03:42:14

RAMA Ready.

 

10:03:48:08 - 10:04:32:03

RAMA In India having a baby is the top priority of the marriage. So they don’t mind spending money on this problem. So if we can’t say it is… affordability. It is the desire, it is the decision, it is the determination that they want to do that makes the difference, not the affordability. If they have taken the decision that they want to have the baby they get the money by hook or crook. In the whole of India when I started there were only 6 or 7 clinics. Today? Mushrooms.

 

10:04:39:03 - 10:05:16:07

RAMA There’s a lot of liquid in your uterus.If we implant the embryo it will not adhere.We need to postpone the implant.

PATIENT Next month?

RAMA Yes. Look at that dark area. When the uterus is like this you may use medicines, but nothing happens. That’s why we have to cancel the implant. Tell her to be brave, not to be tense.

 

10:06:11:16 - 10:06:27:16

VARALAXMI The lady who took me here is called Varalamma. I agreed to the job she offered me because my husband had left home and I went to live in my mother’s house. 

 

10:06:29:05 - 10:07:04:23

VARALAXMI That lady said that I shouldn’t depend on my mother for long and that I should think about my daughter’s future. They will give me a lot of money, that's why I agreed. I know they will take good care of the baby, so I won’t have any problems giving it up. The baby will be given to rich people who can look after it better. I would like to see the baby at least once but I don’t know if they will let me.

 

10:07:18:00 - 10:07:28:07

NURSE Have you taken the tablets?

VARALAXMI No, madam.

NURSE You should take them every day. You will relax if you take the tablets regularly.

 

10:08:07:12 - 10:08:21:21

VARALAXMI If it is a boy they will pay more. I feel that this time it is a boy. Because I feel very strong.

 

10:08:47:06 - 10:09:18:09

JHUMA I was so fat. My sari was a gift from your family, it was beautiful. Your brother’s wife was slim at that time. Now she is so fat. Why did you look so gloomy?

NILADRI I am gloomy!

JHUMA This was the first time we saw each other.

 

10:09:21:09 - 10:09:34:16

JHUMA One day in the evening they came to me and talked and they chose me. After that we got married on 9th December 2002.

 

10:09:37:08 - 10:10:06:08

NILADRI Jhuma’s father and brother came to my house for the negotiations.

JHUMA Our marriage was fully arranged. We lived in the same town but we had never seen each other before the wedding. 

NILADRI We met for the first time at the ceremony. Why do you laugh whenever I say something? If you don't stop I will lose my temper.

 

10:10:29:00 - 10:10:50:11

NILADRI My sister had a baby very late. Since she had no child, she was not allowed to enter the temple or participate in any auspicious rituals. No one would take a glass of water from her hands.

 

10:11:19:02 - 10:12:26:10

NILADRI What is the story of God Balarama?

BABA An oracle had revealed to King Kansa that his sister’s 7th son would kill him. But when she was pregnant for the 7th time the Gods prevented the King from killing the baby. They decided that the embryo had to be implanted in another womb. They chose a lady called Devaki. She gave birth to Balarama.

JHUMA An embryo implantation just like in modern times.

NILADRI They took the embryo and put it in another womb.

BABA Embryo implantations already existed in ancient times.

 

10:12:50:17 - 10:13:18:21

NILADRI We have been to many doctors and many gods and goddesses, I’ve already spent a lot of money. Now we are going to Hyderabad because there many people succeed in having babies. We will stop our treatment only when the doctors tell us that we have no chance.

 

10:13:38:24 - 10:14:23:23

RAMA In Hindu religion there is no restriction that you should not do this, you should not do that. So many stories are there related to infertility, so already the culture is there. Everything is totally free. In India, you want to do it, do it, you don’t want to do it, don’t do it. I think all the countries should liberalize everything, because the problem is growing. People are suffering. So why they have kept these restricting rules about the egg donation and surrogacy. I really can’t understand what is the basis behind that.

 

10:14:25:19 - 10:14:49:05

RAMA Congrats, 21 days pregnant, very good. Are you happy?

MAN We were so worried, madam.

RAMA When was the embryo implanted?

MAN 3 weeks ago.

RAMA March 25th.

 

10:14:51:14 - 10:15:28:18

RAMA She had an ovarian failure. Premature menopause, POF: Premature Ovarian Failure. So we have done IVF with egg donation. We pay around 15/20.000 sometimes  if the donor is very educated and highly… then 50.000. Depending upon the person and the qualities the client asks. Most of the time everybody wants good eyes, good colour, good education, good family. Good education doesn’t produce good eggs but people want it.

 

10:15:30:14 - 10:15:48:15

MAN Thank you so much, madam. After so many years we have finally made it.

RAMA How long have you been married?

MAN 11 years.

RAMA If you know someone with the same problem, tell them to come here.

 

10:16:59:24 - 10:17:27:00

NILADRI I grew up in a family of six. My father, my mother, my brothers and my sister. My mother took care of housekeeping and cooking. When she was too old to do everything I decided to get married on condition that my wife should never work, and would only do the housekeeping.

 

10:17:57:16 - 10:18:44:04

JHUMA Actually I wanted to do something before getting married. I wanted to do a job but this is quite... strict rules in his house. He also... he doesn’t want me to do any job. And I haven’t yet completed my education. But with my child I will be busy, involved, engaged. I will not have so many times. To think of it... I think so.

 

10:19:02:03 - 10:19:14:17

NILADRI My back aches.

JHUMA Where does it hurt? Here?

NILADRI Yes.

 

10:19:19:09 - 10:20:45:20

JHUMA If I am not able to conceive I want to adopt somebody else’s. But he doesn’t. He doesn't want... I don't know. It is also a pain for me. He doesn’t support me to adopt anybody. But I want, I need. If I adopt somebody, they will be curious, gossips, asking me why. Why are you trying to adopt? Why? That means you are not able to conceive. And it’s very… you know, ridiculous, humorous… They are educated, still they are really conservative.  In Bengali families, you know, adoption is not so easy. Easy matter, not so...

 

10:21:52:00 - 10:22:37:09

HUSBAND Why did you do it? Tell me why.

VARALAXMI I did it for my daughter.

HUSBAND You have done it without my permission.

VARALAXMI You left home leaving us with no money. I thought that if I got a lot of money I could save for my daughter.

HUSBAND I don’t like this kind of job.I will take legal action against the woman who persuaded you.

VARALAXMI If you want…

HUSBAND You’ve done a very bad thing.

VARALAXMI I know.

HUSBAND You should have informed me.

 

10:22:40:20 - 10:23:38:07

HUSBAND I was working out of town when someone persuaded her proposing pregnancy by tablets and injections and 2,000 USD. When I came back I asked about her big belly. She said that many women were doing this job. I felt very angry. I went to discuss it with the doctors. I said that I didn’t like the sale of a child. They said that it was too late therefore I should accept and I shouldn’t feel angry because the baby is not mine.

 

10:23:48:03 - 10:24:16:03

JHUMA Do you talk to your friends about our problem? What do they ask you?

NILADRI Why don’t you have children? Always the same question.

JHUMA Is it a fault not to have children?

NILADRI It is like a punishment sent to us by the gods.

 

10:24:21:10 - 10:24:55:03

JHUMA He doesn’t cry, he doesn’t express… He doesn’t want to... you know, share with anybody. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I tell somebody. But he... his problem is much more... bigger. So I also feel sorry for him. Sometimes I feel this is my fault, this is my guilt. I am sorry for it.

 

10:25:09:13 - 10:25:42:22

JHUMA Very hopeful tour, very hopeful trip, this is. I have a lot of expectations… In Hyderabad. I hope they will perfectly, specifically diagnose me, what is actually what is the specific problem of me. What is my specific problem. Why I am not conceiving still now.

 

10:27:09:08 - 10:27:49:13

NILADRI Hyderabad is an astonishing city. I have visited many places in India but I’ve never seen a city like this. We will stay here for two weeks, I will spend a lot of money and I will miss several days at work. It will be a big problem for my job. I came here only for her, to see her smile again. I came here only for her happiness.

 

10:28:09:07 - 10:28:56:23

NILADRI Luckily my clothes suit this hot weather.

JHUMA My body is burning in the sun. It’s so hot! How can I do medical tests?

NILADRI You will have to do a lot of tests. Watch out for pickpockets. All these people should be at work. Let’s walk in the shade.

 

10:29:17:19 - 10:30:29:12

RAMA Why didn’t you do what I told you?

EMPLOYEE We are sorry, madam.

RAMA Business reports should contain concrete financial information. How we get finances, what the resources are, etc. Don’t write reports in vague general terms. I don’t want all those things. It is a complete, pure project. How much money we are getting and from where. How we spend one million USD. What our regular income will be. I have given you all those figures. So after spending, how we are going to earn. We are giving just an example from our existing hospital. With this kind of turnover of people who are visiting our hospital we will generate this amount of money. I don’t know whether you’ve understood.

 

10:31:03:22 - 10:32:18:24

PARTNER I have the pleasure to give the cheque directly to you. We want to be associated with you in all your endeavours. You are doing a great job towards fertility.

RAMA If we have success in Karnataka we will expand more. Every day a new centre opens. Today one IVF centre, tomorrow another IVF centre. Every day everybody is facing the same competition.

PARTNER There was an infertility meeting in Chennai. An Australian professor asked the question: India and China are facing population explosion. How come there are so many infertility specialists here? Everyone is wondering why.

RAMA That question was put to me right from the day when I started in fertility. It is not... India is a highly populated country, but in some houses there’s too much wealth and in others none at all. In one house there are ten children, in others none. So, we are not helping to produce more and more children. Hardly one child.

PARTNER Correct.

 

10:32:45:11 - 10:32:54:07

NILADRI Your hands are very cold.

JHUMA IVF is a big matter, I’m worried. To have a child by IVF is no joke.

 

10:33:13:13 - 10:33:50:23

DOCTOR From which year did you start medication?

JHUMA Treatment? Are you saying about treatment?

DOCTOR Yes.

JHUMA Treatment... Maybe from 2004 last…

DOCTOR 2004 you started, ok. 

JHUMA Yes. I suppose.

DOCTOR And all this was in West Bengal.

JHUMA Yes.

DOCTOR So, for you... This scan report, as well as your laparoscopy report, shows that your ovaries are normal and there are eggs in them. So now what we have to see is whether your tubes are also open. So that when you ovulate these eggs are picked up inside.

 

10:34:25:03 - 10:34:46:03

VARALAXMI I met Sunita two days ago when she was sent to bed after the delivery. She is a surrogate mother like me. In this clinic many women give their children away. Some suffer a lot. Sunita was depressed for not having seen the baby.

 

10:34:54:03 - 10:35:09:22

SUNITA I left out all sorts of feelings. Someone had told me this is a bad job. But I knew from the beginning that this baby was not mine. This is why I left out all kinds of feelings. 

 

10:35:27:14 - 10:37:17:24

JHUMA Do you speak Hindi?

SURROGATE No.

JHUMA Please, ask her why she is here.

PURUS Her husband had an accident. She needs money. She is a surrogate mother.

JHUMA I see, she has a problem, she needs money. Does she have other children?

SURROGATE Two children.

PURUS She has two children.

JHUMA Does she know whose baby she’s carrying?

PURUS Do you know whose child it is? Was this baby conceived through injections?

SURROGATE This baby is produced by eggs. I said by eggs.

PURUS It was done by IVF.

JHUMA I’m asking if she knows the couple who will take the baby. She will have to give the baby away, does she feel pain in her heart?

PURUS You have to give the baby away. Do you feel any pain?

SURROGATE No, I don’t.

PURUS She doesn’t feel any pain.

JHUMA Nothing? Please, tell her that I feel very sad.

PURUS She feels very sad for you.

JHUMA After meeting you she feels very sad.

SURROGATE I have no problem.

 

10:37:26:08 - 10:38:29:23

VARALAXMI What is this?

SUNITA The photos of the baby I delivered.

VARALAXMI They should have been taken yesterday.

SUNITA Maybe today. Look, mum, the baby.

VARALAXMI She is beautiful.

SUNITA Yes, she is beautiful. She is nice, isn’t she?

VARALAXMI Is this the English couple?

SUNITA Yes. Are they gone?

VARALAXMI No, they are still here.

SUNITA Where are they?

VARALAXMI Here.

SUNITA What do you mean here?

VARALAXMI They rent a house just round the corner. I saw them.

 

10:39:49:02 - 10:41:03:18

NURSE Look how young Dr Rama is.

RAMA We didn't have the traditional marriage. We used to work in a left organization. So we… our marriage was only an exchange of a garland. We were attracted because they talked about equality to everybody, education, equal wealth, equal opportunity, equal everything. Definitely young blood allows that but once you grow and your interests…  so many things change in the life. You can’t just stick to that and survive. Because you can’t survive sticking to that, we have changed. Otherwise even today I like equality. Everybody should get equal opportunity to study or to do anything. I haven’t changed my thought. Even now I like that but preaching that we cannot survive in the capitalistic society. So to survive you have adopt… you have to walk along the stream.

 

10:41:25:10 - 10:43:14:21

JHUMA Is IVF very expensive? They try three times.

MAN They have a package.

NILADRI Yes, they have a package.

JHUMA How much is it?

MAN 7,000 USD.

JHUMA Oh my goodness! 7,000 USD only to put an embryo in. And then three times to and fro.

NILADRI Not only, we have to stay here at least one month.

JHUMA We don’t have all this money.

NILADRI I know.

MAN You should leave your sadness behind.

NILADRI It is impossible for her. It is like trying to straighten the tail of a dog. It will go back to the same position. Her mentality won’t change.

MAN The problem is when you meet your friends or relatives.

NILADRI Yes, they know about our problem but they keep asking the same question. They know that we don’t have a child but still they ask about the school.

JHUMA That’s true. They ask which year he is in.

NILADRI I reply that he is in year four.

MAN I never ask anybody how many children he has.

NILADRI Me neither.

MAN It’s better if you take someone else’s child. That is the best way to have a child.

JHUMA Are you suggesting adoption?

MAN You’d better forget the gossip of friends and relatives.

JHUMA You’re right.

MAN You should do as you feel.

 

10:43:35:22 - 10:45:35:00

JHUMA Good evening.

RAMA Good evening.

JHUMA How are you?

RAMA Fine, how are you?

JHUMA Thank you.

RAMA What happened, did you have some abortions? Hoq many?

JHUMA One abortion. 

RAMA At the time of miscarriage, could the doctor find out the reason why there was a miscarriage?

JHUMA No, I am so unfortunate. He didn’t…

RAMA So, it was a spontaneous abortion.

JHUMA Spontaneous abortion. Will I be able to become a mother?

RAMA I will tell you. I’m just looking into each and every factor. Both the tubes are kinked. Kinked means that tubes should be like this, straight. Suppose if there is an infection the tube becomes like this.

JHUMA Wavy.

RAMA Yes, wavy. So that shows there is an infection. Most probably such infections are caught after abortion or after delivery, are such kind. So this is called secondary infertility. So if the tube has been infected even though it is not continuing its functions will be compromised. So, because these functions are compromised, so egg and sperm cannot meet.

JHUMA Will you suggest some very powerful medicines for us?

RAMA What powerful! You have a block here, this is not working. So no powerful medicine will be helpful to make this tube normal.

JHUMA Otherwise no way? Is there any substitute, madam?

RAMA Substitute is the test tube baby. Because you are unable to… Egg and sperm are unable to meet in the tube. You are making them meet outside the body.

JHUMA It’s also a problem for us. Because… Very frankly speaking, already we have spent a lot of money. And we have financial problems.

NILADRI What are you saying, shut up!

JHUMA So I am so unfortunate.

RAMA Money you can earn any time, you have to find ways how to earn money, you have to find ways how to earn money.

 

10:46:10:17 - 10:47:54:03

NILADRI You think too much, you get too much tension. What will happen we will accept.

JHUMA I cannot accept not to become a mother.

NILADRI All the money I saved we can use for it. What else can I do?

JHUMA I don’t want. If the success rate is 95% as they say, we might try. I can sell my jewels to do it. I might buy them again in the future.

NILADRI I never thought that having a child could be such a problem. People have children right after marriage.

JHUMA Do you realize that I am hated by your family? Your sister and your brother both have babies.

NILADRI My family doesn’t hate you.

JHUMA When your brother’s wife cradles her baby how do you think I feel?

NILADRI You should consider that baby as your own, just as you accept adoption.

JHUMA Your friend has said he can arrange a baby for us to adopt. We have to take a decision.

NILADRI People will say he’s not ours. Do you want your own child or do you want to adopt?

JHUMA I don’t know anymore.

NILADRI You think too much.

JHUMA I’m going mad.

NILADRI They are watching us.

JHUMA Let’s go.

 

10:48:08:02 - 10:48:27:19

SUNITA After delivery I was sad. The English couple promised to visit me but they didn’t come. I felt pain because I couldn’t see the baby. But I had a great hope. And then it happened.

 

10:48:40:24 - 10:49:26:22

SUNITA The lady left the baby next to me in the cradle. She doesn’t hold the baby in her arms often. They have no experience with nursing, they try their best. 

 

10:49:36:21 - 10:50:12:11

VARALAXMI I would do it again. The decision will depend on my relationship with my husband. If the delivery goes well and my relationship with my husband is good I think I will do it again. The money I earned will bring peace to our family. Now my husband has agreed with my choice. With the advance they gave me I bought him a rickshaw. Now he has a job.

 

10:50:47:10 - 10:51:37:07

VARALAXMI I will give 400 USD to my mother. Then I will pay off my debts. I will deposit the rest for my daughter. I always wanted to study. When I see students I get the desire again. At least now I can support my daughter’s studies. I will enroll her at the English School. She won’t be illiterate like my mother and me.

 

10:52:11:21 - 10:52:51:03

NILADRI In Hyderabad all women have a job. It’s nice that they are independent here. They drive motorbikes and cars. They go to shopping malls alone. I like it. Since we have no children, and Jhuma would like to work, I now accept that she could have a job. I changed my mind because I married her for a goal, since we aren’t succeeding why shouldn’t I accept her request?

 

10:52:58:01 - 10:54:00:08

NILADRI Would you like to work here?

JHUMA Good idea.

NILADRI Remember they work 12 hours a day here. From 9 in the morning till 9 in the evening.

JHUMA What a nice necklace!

NILADRI And no holidays.

JHUMA The one with bangles.

NILADRI It will cost 4,000 USD. I like that one.

JHUMA Who for?

NILADRI I just like it.

JHUMA Are you thinking of me?

NILADRI If I had the money…

JHUMA Really?

NILADRI It’s beautiful.

JHUMA Love is enough for me.

NILADRI Doesn’t it look girlish?

JHUMA For a schoolgirl.

NILADRI Right, not for a lady.

JHUMA Are you thinking about a present for our anniversary?


 

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