Time Speaker Dialogues
01:01:15:04 Busiswe I’ve got five children; they were six then one passed away.
01:01:20:05 Busiswe This boy here, he’s my first-born, he’s the man of the
house and his twin sister is still at school.
01:01:30:21 Busiswe These are my girls, my angels, the twins.
His name is Bongane, this is Bongiwe and that one is
Dumiso.
01:01:40:15 Busiswe I stay with them here and with my mum.
So this is our little house.
01:01:51:07 Busiswe Too have so many children is too hard, but I am use to it
now. I am so proud of them, because they didn’t say,
because we don’t have a father, a proper family, so we
can just do, as we like.
01:02:10:22 Busiswe They respect me, so I just let them be. But I am very strict
when it comes to school. Because me I didn’t finish
school, I don’t want them to be like me.
01:02:21:19 Busiswe I want them to succeed in life, to have something I
couldn’t get.
01:02:28:20 Busiswe Like now I’ve got nothing, I only got my kids and the little
job I am doing.
I want more than that.
01:02:38:05 Busiswe Come and explain to me here, because, I don’t
understand, maybe she is telling me the wrong thing, and
I am saying yes yes yes.
01:02:46:12 Busiswe Being a mother to me … it’s not that I hate it, I don’t,
really I don’t, just that I became a mother at the early age.
01:03:00:12 Busiswe I didn’t enjoy being a child, being a teenager, I didn’t. I
want to see myself going far. I just want my first born to
finish school, when they are done, it will be my turn.
01:03:31:22 Busisiwe -­‐ What were you busy with, outside?
01:03:35:12 Bongane -­‐ Girlfriend
01:03:40:06 Busiswe
-­‐ What’s her name?
01:03:41:23 Bongane
-­‐ I am not telling you anything
01:03:43:12 Busiswe
-­‐ Why?
Have you done it?
01:03:47:14 Bongane -­‐ Yes, 12 times
01:03:50:04 Busiswe
-­‐ I wanna know, so that I can buy you condoms.
And me I don’t want to be a grand mother, I am still young
to be a grand mother.
01:04:02:10 Bongane
-­‐ Um Um, you are old now
01:04:04:17 Busiswe -­‐ Oh, are you ready to be a father?
- You! That’s a new thing to me …
I never thought this day will come, when I am going to
here something like this.
01:04:23:12 Busiswe
-­‐ Have you ever go and get tested for HIV?
01:04:27:01 Bongane
-­‐ No
01:04:28:17 Busiswe -­‐ So you must go, because you are sexually active,
you must go for your test, otherwise, I’m going to
kill you!
01:04:36:18 Bongane
-­‐ If I die I die …
01:04:40:22 Busiswe
That’s a stupid answer
01:04:54:23
Bongane
This is where I spend most of my time, playing soccer.
01:05:01:16 Bongane
I don’t like sharing my stories out you see, I just like
everything to be quiet and keep inside me.
01:05:12:02 Bongane For me it is hard because I am the only boy in the house
so, I can’t explain my problems with them.
01:05:18:02 Bongane The things I do are based on what of most of the guys do
and I can’t share with women.
01:05:25:23 Bongane It is like sometimes, I feel like the man of the house, and
sometimes I just feel like a mate, roaming around and not
doing anything.
01:05:39:12 Bongane It is hard for her to support the whole family, that’s why
somehow; I just do what I have to do outside to help.
The whole place, they all know me, and they know what
we deal with. If you touch one of the family members,
then it is danger for you.
01:06:05:03 Bongane She was still young, I think at the age of 19, so she had
no ideas what was happening. So, she was just scared,
01:06:16:17 Bongane Not every woman can do such.
She is a mother and she is a father to me.
Yes, I can say, she is the best.
01:06:45:10 Busiswe Sometimes, I feel very bad, that they are growing in this
neighbourhood.
Because here, there is so many things that are
happenings, like drugs.
You see, it is drug and prostitution, alcohol, things like
that.
01:07:00:22 Busiswe So for them it is not good, for me is fine because I am old.
What I did to protect them, I created a friendship between
us, a relationship. That, whenever they come back from
school, they must be with me. We got out and play do
whatever, we come back home and we cook, we eat, we
sleep.
01:07:23:09 Busiswe My daughters, before we opened this virginity testing
thing, we were used to just sit in the house. Because I
was scared they will be raped outside and all of that.
01:07:36:20 Busiswe Then I said ok, let’s just open this virginity testing thing
then that’s where we teach them how to behave as a
woman, how to stay true to yourself until you get married.
It is a traditional thing, long time ago, it was done by the
Zulus only. But now it is for all the nation.
01:08:35:20 Busiswe This stick, is for protection, you see when the boys come
and touch them, then we must give it to them.
01:08:48:13 Busiswe Because nobodies is allowed to touch them. They are
virgins they need to be respected. Nobodies have the
right to do anything to them.
01:09:12:04 Busiswe For me, the reason why I brought them here is because I
want them to be safe. To enjoy, being a young woman. I
don’t want them to be used by boys, to sleep around.
01:09:32:24
01:09:43:21
Busiswe We’re running away from HIV and Aids, early
pregnancies. When they get married, it will be their
choice.
Then they enjoy being here so there is nothing I can say
to stop them.
01:10:20:16 Busiswe That time, when I was growing up
Everybody in the community knew that I was a lesbian
01:10:28:14 Busiswe So men, they decided, No, they ‘re gonna change me
back into being a woman. The only way to change this
person, is to rape her and it didn’t happened once, It
became a habit, I became their playground
01:10:55:12 Busiswe They didn’t even get arrested. I was like scared to talk
about it not knowing that I was pregnant
01:11:10:11 Busiswe All of my children, they are a product of that. But I don’t
let destroy my relationship with them
01:11:20:24 Busiswe Without them, I can’t see myself waking up in the
morning. If they were not around, I would be dead maybe.
I used to think about killing myself
But again, what if, what happened to me happens to them
and you find that I am not even around to protect them.
01:11:55:02 Busiswe I’ve been in love before with another lady.
Just because, I wasn’t over what happened to me, our
relationship didn’t worked.
01:12:15:06 Busiswe Because I don’t feel confortable being touch. That’s my
problem.
01:12:20:14 Busiswe But hopefully god will give me someone one day and I will
be glad, if I can be given somebody. I will be happy
01:13:19:08 Captions
Crimes against lesbians have reached epidemic
proportions in South Africa.
01:13:26:16 Captions
Each year, thousands of women are raped to be ‘cured’
of their homosexuality.
01:13:38:08 Credits Filmed and Directed by Iris Lebrun
01:13:45:00 Images: Iris Lebrun
Sound: Iris Lebrun
Edit: Iris Lebrun
01:13:51:18 Special thanks Special thanks to Busisiwe and her children
Collen Mfazwe and Helen Littleboy
Beyond Your World